As promised were getting blogalicious. Like acid on little bits of colored paper the gossip magazines have my mind melted to an Alice an Wonderland world of degeneracy and amazement. I mean Star, In Touch, Life & Style this is the type of healing crack we all should get addicted to. Think millions of dollars, hand holding and fame would put you on the straight and narrow? You might just want to think again. I mean this stuff becomes more ridiculous by the week. Just when you think you have seen and heard it all another celebrity or public figure does something so amazingly degenerate that you just have to figure your life could not be that bad. Now in the new Star there are tons of two-three page full stories. Chris Brown / Rihanna this, Nadya Suleman that, Portia De Rossi what what? There however was one hidden little blurb that I could not believe. The title was “FRESH PRINCE” (so I am thinking an article about the great comedy cast of the 90’s or someone is coming out of the closet). The blurb reads:
Okay call me a little crazy but isn’t it a bit more newsworthy that the Prince of England/Britian is a closet KKK’er. Talk about the fresh prince coming out of the closet. I mean if my kid after a long deliberation (and we all know Halloween costumes are planned out – As a kid I used to plan that shit for months) came to me and said dad “I want to be a Nazi for Halloween” Halloween night would be spent with us in rehab. WTF is the royal family thinking. Royal jackasses is all I can think of. I mean does anyone find this a bit odd or more news worthy then a little blurb. Prince Harry sounds like a true scum bag and racism in any way should not be tolerated.
Okay so I will finally LIGHT UP on the Michael Phelps story. I had to let the POT boil a little ya know. My mind had to marinate and move to a HIGHER level on the subject. For a man who just had worked his ass off for a few years and finally got a chance to relax with his BUDS can we really blame the kid for having a little fun with his friends. After all the SMOKE has cleared is this really that bad. I loved how in some of the more BLAZING magazine articles they emphasized the point that he obviously was well practiced and knew what he was doing. Hey no need to take a HIT at the kid. Yeah, well he does have a BAGGY full of double digit Olympic Gold Medals. Knew what he was doing? This kid probably came out of his mom’s vajayjay walking, talking and swimming. Dude could probably build a pyramid if you asked him to. I think every article or point of view has missed the entire JOINT, oops typo I mean point of the story. Who cares if Michael blazes it. The only point is that an American hero and icon after work every once in a while wants to hang out with a plant. Give me a break. When I exercise on Venice beach there are about twenty dealers milling around and better yet a guy out amongst 1000’s of people and plenty of police screaming “Get your medical Marijuana perscription right here, the doctor is taking walk in’s”. Good Game America. Maybe California could become its own country (now that’s a sick idea to think about). American economic freaking crisis. Hey America? Want to make an extra 20-50 billion a year. Tax online poker and ganja. Fucking war and terrorism. What a scam and shit ass way to donk off your money. Its looking like Obama could not even bail us out of a wet paper bag with scissors and a machete (sorry for the tangent back to our boy Mr. Phelps). The only chink in his armor was the drunk driving incident. I mean that is a big no no just ask Mr. Barkely (Charles I am coming at you soon in a next blog, Im coming gunning for you too soon A-ROD). Michael lets remember just cause you can swim with goggles does not mean you can drive with your beer goggles.
Is getting dizzy like the kid version of getting drunk? So I have a little nephew that fortunately for a long time I have gotten to see almost every weekend. This kid is awesome. I have learned so much from him. Well every once in a while I will pick him up and spin him around above my head. He always giggles and laughs out loud and wants to do it as much as my flabby old arms will let him. Well he still has not figured out the concept of getting dizzy. So after all the fun of spinning when his feet hit the ground he gets a very confused look on his face and I basically have to hold him otherwise he will just eat it after taking one step. He obviously likes it though as the things he does not like he will certainly let you know. So I guess to all those parents of little kids out there. Spin um around. See if they like it. Laugh your ass off as they learn the concept of getting dizzy. Let the child get “kid drunk”. Just be careful as you might have a future spinaholic on your hands.
Last go check this dude out on you toob. Some funny ass music.
